The boy ran up onto his grandfather’s porch. His face was lit with excitement and his eyes were shining. “Hello, Grandfather. How are you this fine evening?”
The grandfather had been watching the boy as he approached, skipping down the street. “I am well, young one. What has you so enthused this evening?”
“Why, I’m here to learn more about who I am. Remember last time, I told you that now that I know I am the answer to the question, ‘Who am I?’, I want to know more about myself.”
“I do remember that” the grandfather smiled. “And, are you now expecting me to tell you all about yourself?”
“Well… yes” the boy replied sitting on the porch near his grandfather’s rocking chair.
“And, do you think that I know you better than you know yourself?” The grandfather was raising one eyebrow.
“Uh-oh,” the boy thought to himself. This usually meant the boy was in for another lesson, but not many answers. “Well,” the boy decided to alter his approach. “Last time we were talking, I remember that, with your help, I figured out that the two wolves came from me, but I never really understood where I came from.”
“Ah ha,” the grandfather was ready and waiting for this. “So you want to know where you came from, and you want me to tell you? Is that about right?”
“Well, yes. I guess so.” The boy wasn’t sure where to go from here.
“And, you are worried that I will tell you to figure it out for yourself. Am I right?”
“Ah, yes.” The boy was starting to hope he might be off the hook, and that his grandfather would tell him some stories that would help him understand. And, he was not disappointed.
“Ok. Let’s begin at the beginning.” His grandfather checked his pipe, took a couple of long pulls, letting the smoke out slowly so it floated in a small grey cloud around his head. Then, he paused, looking out at the evening sky before he began.
“I told you that the story of the two wolves has been handed down from the Cherokee elders for many generations. Well, in similar fashion, peoples from every time and place in the world have passed down stories about the creation and all the creatures in it to their next generation. The story, well stories really, that I’m going to tell you now are very old, older than the Cherokee people and their stories. These stories come from India and have been told and re-told in songs and poetry by Indian sages since people started to settle the southern Indian continent thousands of years ago. This is what they tell about the eternal being and the creation, and man’s place in the universe.”
“Did they know about the two wolves, Grandfather?”
“They did, but they talked about them a little differently. And I, from my own experience, talk about them in my own way. You must listen, consider the stories, and use them to guide your investigation into your self.”
“Ok.”
“Good.” The grandfather went on, “these sages saw the eternal being as having three different forms. They called them ‘Brahma,’ ‘Vishnu,’ and ‘Shiva.’
Brahma is the creator, Vishnu is the sustainer of all that is created, and Shiva is the destroyer. Brahma transforms the infinite into form, which is what we call the creation, or the world. Vishnu protects the forms which have been created from dissolving back into their primordial essence, which has no form. Vishnu, himself, takes human form and enters the world to guide us through his creation. The world exists inside of time, and time wears away at the world until it comes to meet Shiva, who awakens full of joy, and dances in ecstasy until what has been created dissolves back into the infinite, formless essence from which it came. It is Vishnu, in one of these forms, that always exists. He has no beginning and no end. He lives outside and inside of creation, and everything is contained within him. He simply is.”
“Grandfather?” the boy could not help interrupting. “What does infinite mean?”
“It means that which is outside the bounds of space and time, and thus cannot be known by the Bad Wolf, which is bound by time.”
“What about the Good Wolf? Is he, too, bound by time?”
“No, young one. The Good Wolf belongs to that part of us that holds the essence of the infinite. That essence has no beginning, no end, and cannot be created, nor destroyed. It simply is. Sometimes, it takes form, and sometimes it simply exists within itself. It is what gives us life. It is the am in I am.”
“Wow.” The boy was full of wonder.
“Are you ready for a story now?” asked the grandfather after some minutes of silence.
“Yes, please.”
In the Beginning
“There once lived a sage named Markandeya. He, like you, was interested in finding out more about himself, and spent his time going from place to place, enjoying the beauty of the world and the people in it.
“Do you remember that I said Vishnu sustains everything created? Well, in this story, Vishnu was dreaming about the world Brahma had brought into form. The entire creation existed within Vishnu’s dream. There was nothing outside his dream. Outside the dream was all the uncreated essence without form.
“So, here is Markandeya wandering around the only world he knows, completely unaware that he is a character in Vishnu’s dream, when suddenly, Vishnu’s mouth falls open in his sleep, and Markandeya sails into the nothingness on Vishnu’s outgoing breath. Markandeya is terrified. He can see nothing, hear nothing, smell nothing, taste nothing, and feel nothing. He is completely alone. He cries out but cannot hear his own cry. There is nothing to carry his cries to his own ears. He is suspended in the void. There is no time where he is.
“Finally, Vishnu breaths in again, and Markandeya is sucked back into the world he knows. He is sitting in a field and everything is as normal as it ever was for him. Once his heart has slowed down and he has leaned over and smelled the grass, and felt the solid earth beneath him, he gets shakily to his feet and goes on his way. Time passes, for he is back inside creation where time exists. After a while Markandeya forgets what happened to him, and goes on with his life as it was.
“After quite a while, Markandeya has traveled to another part of the country. When he is sitting under a tree on a small hill beside the road, Vishnu once again lets his mouth fall open in his sleep, and Markandeya is carried into the void on Vishnu’s out going breath. As before, Markandeya is terrified. Alone. Unable to feel, or see, or hear, or taste, or smell. He is completely lost. There is no time. He is no where.
“As before, Vishnu once again inhales in is sleep, and Markandeya is sucked back into the dream of the world he knows. Markandeya cannot comprehend what is happening to him. Where does he go? How long is he there? Can he make it stop happening?
“But, again, after some time, Markandeya begins to forget what happened to him. Not altogether, but his fears dwindle as the time passes.”
“It happens again, doesn’t it?” The boy couldn’t help himself.
“It does,” replied his grandfather. “But, this time something new happens. When Markandeya rides Vishnu’s out going breath, he sees there is a cosmic child, floating in the void, asleep on the leaf of a banyan tree. The child awakens and addresses Markandeya, telling him that he, the child, is Vishnu in this form. The cosmic child then compliments Markandeya on his devotion to acquiring knowledge as he wandered around the world. And, then he reveals to Markandeya the secrets of how Vishnu forms the creation out of himself, cares for his creation and everything in it, and then absorbs that creation back into himself. In the beginning of each new age Vishnu, in this form of the sleeping child, awakens and takes the form of Brahma to create the world and all that exists therein, anew. The cosmic child continued, telling Markandeya that once the creation is complete, the cosmic child takes form as Vishnu, and enters the world himself as a human being to help us understand and protect it. Likewise, at the end of each age, Vishnu manifests in the form of Shiva to dissolve the creation back into the primordial sea from which it was created. Then Vishnu returns to sleep as the cosmic child.”
The grandfather rocked back in his chair and refilled, tamped, and relit his pipe. After he had smoked for a few minutes, he looked at the boy, who was sitting quietly by his chair thinking about the story he had just heard.
“Grandfather?” the boy started out slowly, “does this mean that we are living in someone else’s dream world?”
“Well,” the grandfather replied. “Yes and no.”
“What do you mean, Grandfather?”
“You know how Markandeya traveled between the dream world and primordial sea, where he met Vishnu? What does that tell you about Markandeya?”
The boy looked out at the sunset for a few minutes, pondering the question. Then he said, “If Markandeya existed in both Vishnu’s dream, and he could float around in the formless void and talk to Vishnu as the cosmic child, it must mean there is part of him that exists before and after each creation, and that he can live inside each creation as well.” He paused, then looked at his grandfather. “Does that make sense, Grandfather?”
“Yes, young one. It makes a great deal of sense. Markandeya was experiencing both the I and the am of himself. In this world he was inside of time and space and was experiencing the I, and in the formless essence he was outside of time and space where there is no I, and he was the am.
Do you remember that we started out talking about the two wolves? Well, when the world is created at the beginning of each new age, human beings are each created with both the Good Wolf and the Bad Wolf inside of them. The two wolves are the same size and strength. The creator builds his creation out of love. This is the heart of Vishnu, and he builds each being around this core of his love. The Good Wolf and his qualities live in this core. This is the heart within each of us. Each of us is also given consciousness.”
“Consciousness? What exactly is consciousness, Grandfather?”
“Consciousness is the ability to be aware of our own existence and perceive everything around us. It is also through consciousness that we can experience the love from which we are created. It is this consciousness that enables us to recognize both the Good Wolf and the Bad Wolf. Our consciousness allows us to know and understand the world and ourselves. We can choose which of the wolves we wish to allow to guide us though our lives.
“We are given our five senses with which to see, and hear, and smell, and taste, and touch the world. And, we are given our minds to organize our experiences into thoughts by which we can understand those experiences. The five senses we use to interact with the world exist so we can live in this creation, but belong to us only while we are in this world. They are temporary. The Bad Wolf prefers these senses and uses them to store our experiences in his own way. It’s like he is recording our life as it is happening and storing it for later. Then, later he considers what has expired and uses these memories to construct meaning and plan for the future. While he is busy thinking about the past and using the memories to imagine what he will do in the future, he is not really paying attention to the present. But, he is not concerned because he is recording it.
“These five senses through which we experience the world outside of us are a manifestation of five similar senses that belong to Vishnu’s world, both the dreaming and the sleeping part. The Good Wolf likes these senses because they put us in touch with the heart within us and give us a fuller understanding of our life. It is the heart that connects us to the infinite that exists outside of creation and time. It is the door through which Vishnu passes in and out of form on his breath. It is this door that Vishnu showed Markandeya. Vishnu also showed Markandeya how to use his breath to go back and forth with Vishnu as he makes and unmakes the world. It is the breath that is our connection to Vishnu. Everything exists in Vishnu. Even time lives inside of him. In Vishnu there is no past and no future, just now. This is how the Good Wolf understands the world and connects the answers with the questions. The breath is the thread that binds everything together.”
“How do we choose the Good Wolf? How do we get to know how to use his five senses to go inside and find the door?” the boy wanted to know.
“Remember that I told you the Good Wolf lives in the heart, and you get to understand him through love. The Bad Wolf always seeks explanations for everything using the outward senses. Because of this he can only find answers that are temporary. These do not satisfy him. He can find no answers in him so he borrows ones from others, or makes them up.”
“I thought you said each question gets created at the same time as the matching answer.” The boy thought he saw an inconsistency.
“That is true.” His grandfather said. “Both the answers and the questions are created as part of us. The Good Wolf has the answers that the Bad Wolf wants. But, the way the Bad Wolf chooses to experience life robs him of the ability to find them. The Bad Wolf cannot understand where the Good Wolf lives. The Good Wolf is like Markandeya, he can go anywhere he wants. He exists in both the world and the primordial sea out of which the world arises. And, when you make the Good Wolf your friend, he can take you with him wherever he goes.”
“Wow,” the boy was in awe.
“Yes.” The grandfather agreed.
***
